Is that something sparkly?

Jack: Some people at work are calling me "Darth Veenstra" when I play Bridge with them.

Laura: Isn't "Darth" from "Star Wars"?

Jack: Yes, but they think I'm evil and powerful when it comes to cards because I can figure out what cards they are holding and sometimes I will taunt them when I know that a finesse will win or that they are squeezed and have to discard a good card.

Laura: But you can't really know what cards other people have, can you?

Jack: Yes, that's what makes Bridge such a great game. You can see half the deck at the beginning and you can make deductions from the cards they play and from the bidding.

Laura: Not all of us can remember all the cards that are played, you know.

Jack: I can't remember all the cards either, but I can usually remember more than the other players, so they think I'm a lot more dangerous than I am.

Laura: You know that game where a group of people take turns introducing themselves and they say one thing they like. Well, after a few people, I see something sparkly and I forget all their names!

Jack: Yeah, we all have a hard time remembering names.

Laura: Yes, but one thing you don't realize is that I secretly put your name on the back of all your shirts. So I can say, "Good morning....[cranes her neck to look behind me]...Jack. And you like...[looks behind me again]...dogs!"

Everything's a Competition

Laura: Hey Jack, guess what day it is tomorrow? .... My anniversary!
Jack: I know, it's mine too. (What a coincidence!)
Laura: But it's mostly mine.

My wife, "Knuckles"

[I forgot to return a call from Laura and after a while she called me back. I stepped out onto the balcony to talk to her.]

Laura: I can't believe you forgot to call me back!
Jack: Yeah, I'm sorry. But you know... I was, um, just reaching into my pocket to get my cell phone when you called.
Laura: You're such a fibber! You better watch it: you're on a balcony so it would be really easy for God to strike you with lightning!
Jack: Okay, maybe I thought of calling you just after my phone rang...
Laura: It's a good thing my nickname isn't "Knuckles" or you would be in for quite a beating!