Laura often calls me when she's bored and I've learned to give the correct answers to her questions:
Jack: Hi Sweetie.
Laura: Are you missing me?
Jack: A whole bunch.
Laura: Good answer. I won't have to change the locks...
Later, when she's ready to hang up:
Laura: Well, I can't just stand around all day and verbally spar with you...
Jack: You often do...
Laura: Bite me. Oh, see, I did have another minute to talk...
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Friday, September 23, 2005
Sunday naps
Laura: You can take a nap now if you want.
Jack: No, I'm okay.
Laura: But you didn't get a nap today.
Jack: Well, I kind of dozed in the comfy chair while the kids ran around screaming.
Laura: Huh. Usually you're upstairs in bed asleep by the time I say "You can...[take a nap]"
Jack: No, I'm okay.
Laura: But you didn't get a nap today.
Jack: Well, I kind of dozed in the comfy chair while the kids ran around screaming.
Laura: Huh. Usually you're upstairs in bed asleep by the time I say "You can...[take a nap]"
And you thought childbirth was painful...
One day Laura exicitedly pointed to an ad in the paper for surrogate mothers.
Laura: Look at this! [tap, tap] $22,000 for having a baby. I could do that!
Jack: [laughing] Sweetie, you said you'd never want to do that again when you had Brianna.
Laura: But look: $22,000! [tap, tap, tap]
Later that day Laura was talking about how having a baby stretches the body and muscles and so on.
Jack: And you wanted to have another baby earlier today...
Laura: For $22,000? Yeah, I'd have a baby rhino.
Laura: Look at this! [tap, tap] $22,000 for having a baby. I could do that!
Jack: [laughing] Sweetie, you said you'd never want to do that again when you had Brianna.
Laura: But look: $22,000! [tap, tap, tap]
Later that day Laura was talking about how having a baby stretches the body and muscles and so on.
Jack: And you wanted to have another baby earlier today...
Laura: For $22,000? Yeah, I'd have a baby rhino.
London trip
I called home to tell my wife that I was going to London on a business trip.
Jack: Hi Sweetie. Guess what? I'm going to London!
Laura: You better bring me back something nice, like a cute British guard. And make sure he has his hat. Which kid do you think you'll take with you?
Jack: Ha ha.
Laura: You think I'm joking. Just imagine holding Jason on your lap for 15 hours on the plane.
Jack: Sweetie, I just called to ask you for my passport number.
Laura: 1-800-nuh-uh.
Jack: What am I going to do with you?
Laura: Bring me along. And leave the kids.
Jack: Don't worry, Dear, I'll send you a postcard. [chuckle]
Laura: That's it! I'm going to shred your passport. Here Jason: munch, munch!
Later, I had to call back to get the expiration date.
Jack: Hi Sweetie, I also need the expiration date.
Laura: March 13, 2007.
Jack: So that means I need to return back home by March 12?
Laura: You're gonna get a butt-kicking!
Jack: Hi Sweetie. Guess what? I'm going to London!
Laura: You better bring me back something nice, like a cute British guard. And make sure he has his hat. Which kid do you think you'll take with you?
Jack: Ha ha.
Laura: You think I'm joking. Just imagine holding Jason on your lap for 15 hours on the plane.
Jack: Sweetie, I just called to ask you for my passport number.
Laura: 1-800-nuh-uh.
Jack: What am I going to do with you?
Laura: Bring me along. And leave the kids.
Jack: Don't worry, Dear, I'll send you a postcard. [chuckle]
Laura: That's it! I'm going to shred your passport. Here Jason: munch, munch!
Later, I had to call back to get the expiration date.
Jack: Hi Sweetie, I also need the expiration date.
Laura: March 13, 2007.
Jack: So that means I need to return back home by March 12?
Laura: You're gonna get a butt-kicking!
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