[After Laura got up to calm Jason by reinserting his pacifier:]
Jack: "Don't you feel like a pacifier attendant?"
Laura: "Yeah, the pay is terrible and the benefits suck. Literally."
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My wife Laura is one of the most spontaneous and expressive friends I have the pleasure of knowing. She constantly spouts many outrageously funny sayings, seemingly unintentionally. Here are some of the things she has said that I managed to write down before she tackled me. Some background information: Laura is not quite 5 feet tall and works hard at home being a mom to Brianna and Jason.
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