Fans!

[After some people left comments on this web page:]
Jack: "See, you have fans!"
Laura: "I don't want fans. I want to live in ambiguity."

Laura

Here's Laura!

Quick, fall asleep!

[On the night before the first day of preschool when we realized we would have to get up early the next morning:]
Jack: "If we fall asleep right now, we'll get almost 8 hours of sleep."
Laura: "I'm almost happy."

Dictator-by-marriage

[After giving in, once again, to Laura's demands:]
Jack: "This is a marriage, right? Not a dictatorship."
Laura: "You're half right. This is a marriage...."

Warming up

[On a cold evening, upstairs]
Laura: "It's freezing up here. I thought heat rised....raised....went up!"

I knew that a house was a time-sink, but...

Laura: "Are we ever going to stop remodeling?"
Jack: "I think we will always be working on this house."
Laura: "But not like this, where we are working 24/8!"

Searching

Laura: "This is like searching for hay in a haystack."
[said while looking for a certain bill in an unorganized pile of old bills.]